Rise of the Killer Ostriches

Ostrich attacks doctor
George - A doctor from Oudtshoorn had to know how to pedal on New Year's Eve when an ostrich in rut flew at him on a mountain bike route winding through a game reserve at the Klein Brak River.

Dr Jaco Jordaan, 38, and his wife Lorette, 36, were both participating in the Grabadoo mountain bike, road bike and walk/run event when they rode through an ostrich camp at the Botlierskop Game Reserve.

Bystanders said the ostrich had apparently been standing around all morning, looking curiously at the cyclists.

Jordaan said the ostrich "suddenly" attacked her husband about 20m metres before the gate of this camp. "I saw the ostrich standing there. All at once he darted straight at Jaco. I got such a fright, perhaps because I saw everything happening.

"He kicked Jaco on the calf - luckily it was not serious. I think I got a bigger fright than my husband,"' she told Die Burger on Tuesday.



Ladies and gentleman, the end is nigh. First there were reports of man eating chickens prowling the Serengeti. Next, there was an uprising of Chimpanzee's demanding voting rights following the mapping of the human gene. It showed remarkable similarities to our primate cousins, and they used that as motivation. Following this, a pack of French poodles urinating on that most phallic of French icons, the Eiffel tower.

Now it seems the birds are sending their biggest cousin to kick us - homo sapiens, the top of the food chain - when we are down. It is only a manner of time before the insects comprehend what is going on. Our days on this earth are numbered.