An open letter to an open letter to Mike Basson of Avastar

This is an open letter to an open letter to Mike Basson (owner of Avastar). Avastar is a new club that is built around the idea of emulating theme clubs on the Vegas strip. I haven't been there, but I couldn't help but notice how the owner did a great job at marketing his venture through social media, particularly with an Avastar Youtube video.

You would gather from this blog that I am a big fan of cheese, which is why I like heavy metal and horror films. I also like corny cheese which is why I hope to visit Avastar in the near future. But a couple of minor points came to mind while reading the open letter linked to above.

"From a Capetonian perspective... "

This is a dead give-away that this is not really a Capetonian perspective. Real Capetonians are wilfully ignorant of anywhere in the country beyond the mountains that the eye can see. It's only political refugees from Gauteng who went to Model C schools and then to UCT who feel the need to point out to the rest of the country that they are Capetonian. Real Capetonians won't speak to the rest of the country out of principle because true Capetonians are Trustafarians. 

The Trustafarians even put a mountain between them and the other people who live in Cape Town. Despite these measures, meeting a true Capetonian is not as hard as it sounds. If you'd like to meet a native Capetonian, you'd have to resort to these two simple steps:

1. Find a native Capetonian.
2. Convince them that you are not from beyond the mountains.

This is a reasonable approximation of what a Capetonian looks like in the field.

 The former is not as hard as it sounds, you just need to follow that distinguished Hospice thrift shop smell. The latter is easily achieved by taking on the appearance of a recently mugged and desensitised golf enthusiast. This is to say you need a grandpa hat but be sans golf gear and sans caddy. Caddies are very Boere-Swazi and we only still keep them in Gauteng. I'm not sure why we do as they frequently make off with our golf gear.

The final cog in the wheel is that you must use the Zen approach. This means using the age old reverse psychosis technique. To clarify, if you were not Capetonian, the obvious thing to do would be to look, smell and feel like a thrift shop before you approach people in an unassuming manner to meet them. 

In Gauteng, we do this mostly to show that we are unarmed. This is so we don't get shot in the face by people who assume unassuming approachers are in fact trying to take their golf gear by force. In Cape Town, you must appear like you are merely part of the scenery and you're trying to avoid Those Who Walk Behind The Mountains. Sooner or later, you would bump into a Capetonian and you'd start talking. Good locations for these chance meetings are recently gentrified neighbourhoods with a few remaining buildings on the verge of getting demolished.

The reason I'm mentioning this is that Cape Town's little known and even less frequented underbelly has scummy joints the likes of which Mike Basson can only dream of with his Avatar blue fur wet dream.

I intend on visiting Avastar in the near future. I have to try a cocktail on a goddess.

Babes and badasses: Review of Dr Feelgood by Motley Crue

While researching Giallo films, I encountered the terms babes and badasses which describe the type of characters you may encounter in Grindhouse films. 'Babes and badasses' together make for a pretty catchy phrase so I decided to make it the theme for this month.

This first instalment centres around a band that is comprised of badasses who look like babes. There is an important moral lesson to be learnt from this: First check which way the spandex stretches before you wolf howl or cat call.

Conclusion

I think producer Bob Rock best sums up this album:

"Four L.A. badasses who used to drink a bottle of wine and want to kill each other".

Fresh from rehab, the not so fab four return with their refreshing glam metal take on life, the universe and everything. To Mötley Crüe, life, the universe and everything revolve around motorcycles, whiskey and strip clubs. It's not exactly Shakespeare, but that's not always a bad thing.

Review

Dr Feelgood makes you want to shake what mother nature gave you before father time takes it away. Of course, motorcycles, whiskey and strip clubs help to set the mood, but that's basically all there is to say about this badass album.

Dr Feelgood is also unique in that Bob Rock produced it and it isn't utter shyte.

A question of etymology

It has come to my attention that the terms babes and badasses may result in certain ambiguities. I will try to clear them up by means of demonstration.

Why make all this fuss about etymology? In a recent post on Thoughtleader entitled “African-American”: meaning what, exactly?, blogger Catherine Parker illustrates some difficulties those of us of African origin have with understanding the term African-American.


Trevor Richards. He is African. He is American. He's a badass. He's a jackass. He is African-American, but he's not black. What's the opposite of a coconut? Maybe an Eminem?

The google definitions of African-American include:

• A person of African ancestry who is also a citizen of the USA, historic countries of origin include present-day Ghana, Angola, Congo, Senegal, Nigeria, and Gambia.
  
  Since his ancestry is from Africa, Trevor Richards is an African-American. He emmigrated to America and became a naturalised citizen, or is in the process of becoming one.


• Many Americans of African descent use this term of identification.
  
  By this definition too, Trevor Richards would be an African-American.


• American-born black man/woman (vs. immigrant from Africa).
  
  By this definition, Trevor Richards' kids would be African-American if they were borne by Alicia Keys in America, but he would not be African-American because he would be an immigrant from Africa. Even if he were black, he would not be an African-American, because he would still be an immigrant from Africa.


• An American whose ancestors were born in Africa.
  
  By this definition, Trevor Richards and his kids would be African-American when he becomes a naturalised citizen and if they were born there.


• A US citizen having origins in any of the Black racial groups of Africa.
  
  According to our courts, South African Chinese people are black by virtue of the fact that they were disadvantaged during apartheid. As people who qualify for Black Economic Empowerment, if they became naturalised citizens in America, would they be African-American? What about their children?

Clearly it is easy to get caught up indefinitely in definitions. Perhaps this is why Alfred Korzybski wanted to do away with the verb 'to be'. Before Trevor gets dragged behind a bakkie or someone burns a cross on his lawn, allow me to clarify what is meant by the terms babes and badasses.

Babes

A term of address for attractive young women.


Babe. Not the kind of babe under scrutiny here.


Leah Dizon, the kind of babe under scrutiny here. Coincidentally, not a bad ass either. Find more pics of cute babe Leah Dizon at cute Leah Dizon.

Badasses

Persons whose extreme attitudes and behavior are admirable. Cool. Wicked. Bad, but in a good way.


A badass bridge. Not the kind of badass under scrutiny here.


A bad ass. Not the kind of ass under scrutiny here.


Mötley Crüe. A bunch of badasses. These look like babes, but they are in fact the kind of badasses under scrutiny here.

I hope I cleared up the confusion regarding my etymology. If not, don't worry, there will be plenty of babes and badasses this month to bring everyone up to speed.

Track listing

1. T.N.T. (Terror 'N Tinseltown)


2. Dr. Feelgood


3. Slice of Your Pie


4. Rattlesnake Shake


5. Kickstart My Heart


6. Without You


7. Same Ol' Situation (S.O.S.)


8. Sticky Sweet


9. She Goes Down


10. Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)


11. Time for Change
    
    1999 reissue included these tracks:


12. Dr. Feelgood (Demo Version)


13. Without You (Demo Version)


14. Kickstart My Heart (Demo Version)


15. Get it for Free (Demo Version)


16. Time for Change (Demo Version)

Personnel

• Tommy Lee: drums.


• Mick Mars: guitar.


• Vince Neil: vocals.


• Nikki Sixx: bass.

Rating

Doppelganger (1993) Review

Conclusion

This high budget lameness resembles a pretty cool metamorphosis scene with big latex heads, a few buckets of blood and lots of ooze with a half-baked plot added as an afterthought. The doppelganger idea is charming and could be seen as a metaphor for the main character's struggle to come to terms with her higher circuits of consciousness, scared to unleash a monster as it were. Or maybe not, but that's my version and I'm sticking to it.

Plot

A girl (Drew Barrymore) is stalked by her doppelganger in this obvious allusion to her shady drug habits and the resulting explorations of Dr Timothy Leary's 8-circuit model of consciousness. Well, not really. Most of the film is just plodding and dull so I added my own subtext.

Review

"To see the world in a grain of sand, and to see heaven in a wild flower, hold infinity in the palm of your hands, and eternity in an hour." - William Blake

No, William Blake was not on acid. At least not the same acid that Dr Hoffman synthesised. His auguries of innocence do however seem to describe the same kind of phantoms summoned by Dr Timothy Leary with the auguries of lysergide.

Dr Leary did serious psychology work for a while. His interpersonal circumplex model is still used to evaluate and differentiate between personality disorders. After a colleague introduced Leary to psilocybin mushrooms, his area of expertise changed drastically. It is during this period of intense experimentation with psychedelics that Dr Leary developed his seven levels of consciousness model, which he dubbed 'the Seven Tongues of God' (Nevermore fans rejoice!). This model was later improved by Dr Leary and Robert Anton Wilson, after ingesting more drugs in greater quantities. It developed into the 8-circuit model of consciousness.



Dr Timothy Leary, doppelganger for delinquency.

Dr Leary's 8-Circuit Model of Consciousness

According to Dr Leary, the old left brain/right brain consciousness model is more than just the smart maths side versus the dumb arty side. The left side represents our primal modes, needed for our survival, while the right side represents our more divine levels of consciousness, needed for evolution. While it is crucial to awaken the levels of consciousness of the left side in order to survive, it is not necessary to develop the levels of consciousness of the right side of your brain, unless of course you want to have some fun.

The Seven Tongues of God

These refer to the seven basic spiritual questions.

• The Ultimate Power Question: What is the basic energy of the universe?


• The Life Question: What is life?


• The Human Being Question: Who is man?


• The Awareness Question: How does man know?


• The Ego Question: Who am I?


• The Emotional Question: What should I feel about it?


• The Ultimate Escape Question: How do I get out of here?

Robert Anton Wilson added an eighth tongue – What if there are others out there? This might have severe theological ramifications, because in order to accommodate 8 tongues it means we'd have to picture god as Medusa. Unless of course your god is Cthulhu, in which case there are more than enough allegorical tentacles to go around. But wait, there is more!



Medusa. Gorgon. God?

The 8-Circuit Model of Consciousness

Dr Leary assigned each level of consciousness to each of the basic spiritual questions. He further claimed that each level could be achieved with the appropriate contraband.

• The Bio-survival Circuit differentiates between danger and safety. Infants on this level crawl forwards or backwards. It is stimulated by drugs which offer pain relief (opiates like codeine or morphine).


• The Emotional Circuit is concerned with emotion. This mode of consciousness differentiates between submissive and dominant. Infants at this level become aware of up and down. Alcohol stimulates dominant and submissive thinking.


• The Symbolic Circuit deals with logic and abstract thought. It is concerned with dexterity and handling artefacts. At this level, infants become aware of left and right. Stimulants like caffeine and cocaine stimulate this mode of thinking.


• The Domestic Circuit offers tribal awareness. Leary never associated a drug with it, but others have suggested endorphins. This means chocolate!


• The Neurosomatic Circuit is where things get more interesting. The previous modes of consciousness are all affiliated with orientation within an Euclidean geometrical system. The neurosomatic circuit is concerned with orientation outside of fixed points, such as when one floats in water or when one free falls. Leary postulated that we need this kind of consciousness for when we walk in space someday. Marijuana is used to disorient your perceptions of Euclidean space-time.


• The Neuroelectric Circuit is when the mind becomes aware of its personal consciousness. Leary suggests that telepathy occurs at this level. Psilocybin and peyote are used to activate this circuit.


• The Neurogenetic Circuit allows the mind to become aware of the group mind of its species, or awareness of its collective consciousness. LSD is used to activate this circuit.


• The Psycho-atomic Circuit is when the mind becomes aware of super intelligence, or god. Cthulhu is in the ketamine.

What about Doppelganger?

Just like contraband serves as a shortcut to various circuits of consciousness, I will give you a shortcut to the worthy scenes in this film. When watching this movie, skip to the following highlights and cut approximately 50 minutes of dullness from your life:

• the opening, which has a sex scene and a murder back to back


• Drew Barrymore in the shower, with bloodshed on her boobies


• any scene with Leslie Hope, as her character is the only one worth watching. One of her scenes involves Americans pronouncing doppelganger. Hilarious!


• scenes featuring Drew Barrymore with both a pair of shades and a large knife. Note: both accessories, because when she has only one of them nothing happens


• the transformation scene. Don't worry, you'll know

Director

Avi Nesher

Cast

• Drew Barrymore


• Peter Dobson


• Leslie Hope


• George Maharis


• George Newbern

Rating

When skipping to the suggested cool scenes:

When watching the entire film:

Month of Megadeth: Rust In Peace

Conclusion

A masterpiece. All of the Chinese five elements are in perfect harmony, just like with this masterpiece:



Serrana, by guitar prodigy Jason Becker. He took sweep picking - a technique made famous by Yngwie Malmsteen - to a whole new level during his illustrious career.

Review

Rust in Peace reminds me of Taoism. The three jewels of the Tao, namely compassion, moderation and humility, have very little to do with most metal albums. Still, all the forces of the universe seem to be in perfect harmony when you listen to this album.

The truth about the Tao

Tao means path or way. This is the album where Megadeth clearly defined their path and went all the way too. By emphasising the link between people and nature, the need for rules and order is less pressing. Megadeth found a stable line-up for the first time, leading to a better understanding of their world and their surroundings.

Tao also means the flow of the universe, which is only achieved when things are in their natural order. Since So far, so good, so what? struggled to portray Megadeth in their natural order due to frequent line-up changes and more frequent drugs, a change was needed in order to cultivate the Tao.

How to De

De means active living, active cultivation of the Tao. Dave Mustaine did this by going through a 12 step program. Mike Muir of Suicidal Tendencies (don't feel bad if you don't know them, they're not great) once noted that Mustaine lived at the Betty Ford Center. This time, Mustaine was out long enough to cultivate the Tao. Yes, the force is strong with this one.

How to Wu Wei, or how to do by not doing

Wu Wei means action without action. The act of effortless doing managed to let some awesome music flow from these talented musicians.



Leah Dizon, the Japanese star. Wa wa wee wee wu wei!

All the tensions of giving up alcohol and other drugs created a less tense environment. Loose enough for Mustaine to allow bassist David Ellefson to contribute some songs.
Loose enough for the band to be like water, flowing with the Tao. Soft enough to move a dried leaf, hard enough to shatter stone.

The truth about P'u, the uncarved block

P'u is the uncarved block. In this case, new drummer Nick Menza and new guitarist Marty Friedman are the uncarved blocks. Marty Friedman needs no introduction as a guitar hero, and his leads are superb. By employing the true nature of their minds, Megadeth becomes stronger without using effort.

Truly, the one album that proves where all the talent in Metallica was hidden. This is the sound of one hand tapping.

Useless information

• Marty Friedman previously played in Cacophony with guitar prodigy Jason Becker. Their neo-classical feel and synchronised guitar harmonies took heavy metal guitar to a whole new level.


• Dave Mustaine nearly didn't hire Marty Friedman, because he had too many colours in his hair. I guess a fiery red mane is more metal.


• Jason Becker later played for David Lee Roth. He became diagnosed with the degenerative disease amyotrophic lateral sclerosis and doctors gave him three years to live. Jason is still alive and well today, enjoying the envy of many guitar heroes and fans despite being in a wheel chair and unable to play guitar any more.


• "Hangar 18" is one of my favourite songs of all time.


• The title Rust in Peace refers to an anti-nuclear program bumper sticker Dave Mustaine had read. It supports the notion that nuclear warheads should rust in peace.

This is part of the month of Megadeth series on the Necro Files. All the posts of the series are listed below:

• Peace sells, but who's buying?


• So far, so good, so what?


• Rust in peace


• Countdown to extinction

Track listing

1. Holy Wars… the Punishment Due


2. Hangar 18


3. Take No Prisoners


4. Five Magics


5. Poison Was the Cure


6. Lucretia


7. Tornado of Souls


8. Dawn Patrol


9. Rust in Peace... Polaris

Note: The 2004 remixed and remastered version has bonus tracks which I omitted because I do not own that version. You can find the details of those tracks at the All Music Guide review of Rust in Peace.

Personell

• David Ellefson: bass.


• Marty Friedman: guitar.


• Nick Menza: drums.


• Dave Mustaine: guitars, vocals, rehab.

Rating

Is Emo Influenced By Buddhism?

“Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held. Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin. Believe nothing just because someone else believes it. Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.”
Buddha

The Million Blog Project

I'm # 123

Some correlations between Buddhism and emo

In The chauvinist guide to feminism, part 2, I poked fun at emo. Emo, just like religion, is an easy target, but just because it is an easy target doesn't mean it shouldn't be stomped on once in a while. Stomping on homo-erotic fascinations such as these reinforces their respective persecution complexi. Once, the Romans fed Christians to lions, now we merely feed their pathologies.


Shannon Elizabeth. Not emo. Not Buddhist. Just right.

I'd pick on Islam, but those guys don't know how to fly and I live in a tall building. I resolved to poke fun at something completely harmless and docile. From these hot topics, I chose Buddhism as the hot topic of the day.

No bugs were harmed during the writing of this post.

The Four Noble Truths

If you want to know more about this religion, try this 5 minute introduction to Buddhism. Buddhism is responsible for the cliché 'it's not a religion/car/pyramid scheme/hair removal product/bunch of bullshit, it's a way of life'.

Technically, Buddhism isn't a religion, because it is not about worshipping a god. It is about awakening to the real world and by awakening to the real world, Buddhists mean accepting the four noble truths. The four noble truths have nothing to do with Michael Moore or UFO sightings, they are:

1. Life means suffering


2. The origin of suffering is attachment


3. The cessation of suffering is attainable


4. There is a path to the cessation of suffering

Life means suffering?


This is Mr Self-harm, the emo deity. Mr Self-destruct? Thank you, Trent Reznor.

Life means suffering!

That does look like a statement that the one-eyed adolescents of gender defying cosmetic skills would cut into their thighs with a razor.

The origin of suffering is attachment

Attachment. Right. Attachment to some of these might point to the origin of suffering:

• Myspace


• Hair dye


• Shitty punk bands. Actually, that's a tautology. You could just say punk bands


• Eyeliner


• Muppet fringes


• Hair removal gone wrong


• For a girl, chatting up a girl and getting a guy


• For a guy, chatting up a guy and getting a girl


• For a girl, chatting up a guy and getting a girl


• For a guy, chatting up a girl and getting a girl. Well, this only causes suffering when you are emo

But most of all, attachment to those ridiculously tight trousers. You would have to be Jewish, with the circumcision done by an extremely drunk Rabbi who lost his contact lenses at a Bar Mitzvah earlier that day to fit into those.

That might explain the affinity to cutting. It might also explain why one would think that life is suffering. When someone takes a scalpel to your wabos, or anywhere near it, there is reason enough for a life of angst filled with depression.

The cessation of suffering is attainable

The bad news is, a foreskin can't grow back. And neither will your wabos. And neither will your hair once you start balding from too much dye. The good news is tears may be wiped away. Even when they leave deep grooves in your eyeliner.

Emo thinks the cessation of suffering comes with death. In practice, it usually comes after puberty.

There is a path to the cessation of suffering

To achieve a cessation of suffering, Buddhism prescribes the noble eightfold path. This path is meant to be a journey that leads to the gaining of wisdom, ethical conduct and mental development.

1. Right View


2. Right Intention


3. Right Speech


4. Right Action


5. Right Livelihood


6. Right Effort


7. Right Mindfulness


8. Right Concentration

This is were emo gets left behind. Emo does not seem to think there is a cessation of suffering during this lifetime.

Is emo influenced by Buddhism?

Both emo and Buddhism claim that life means suffering. I'm sure Paris Hilton has endured a life of immense hardship and unbelievable suffering.

Both emo and Buddhism claims that attachment is the origin of suffering. To Buddhism, it means attachment to mundane things like wealth and health insurance. To emo, it means attachment to the commercial nature of our society - to the mainstream, but in practice it means attachment to your gender.

Both emo and Buddhism see a cessation to suffering. To emo, the release of endorphins due to self-harm is the temporary cessation. To Buddhism, detachment is the cessation.

Finally, emo and Buddhism do not see eye to eye when it comes to the way to cease suffering. Emo and Buddhism just don't see one eye to epicanthic fold eyes when it comes to this crucial point.



Jane's Addiction, inventive and experimental drag queens from the eighties. Inventive means they didn't really write songs. Experimental means they took lots of drugs and messed around on instruments while high. Drugs. The ignoble onefold path to the cessation of suffering.

In conclusion, I would say there is a 75% correlation between the doctrine of Buddhism and emo. The other 25% of emo is just gay. You could argue that Jane's Addiction is responsible for emo, but I think it is more likely that Marilyn Manson or Trent Reznor caused emo, much to their dismay.

Since the Buddha encourages individualist thinking, and emo demands conforming to their look and way of life, I feel Buddhism "the way of life" deserves some credit as a valuable meme.

Related links

• AMG Media, for the free stock photos.


• Emo on Wikipedia


• Gautama Buddha on Wikipedia


• Shannon Elizabeth pictures on iFrance


• Some inspirational quotes from the Buddha.


• The Coffee Boys. Coffee is a necessary companion on the path to the cessation of suffering.