Showing posts with label bloggers unite. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bloggers unite. Show all posts

03 August 2008

Roger Ebert gets a badass review

Roger Ebert has been sticking his thumbs up and down like a Roman emperor since time immemorial. His general premise is that your movie sucks and he goes at great pompous lengths to convince you that it does.

Since I am an avid horror fan, it is inevitable that Roger Ebert thinks some of my favourite movies suck.

Now the tables have turned. I asked some of the BlogCatalog bloggers to review Roger Ebert in 250 words or less. This is the result of the highly scientific experiment. That's highly scientific according to the broad definition of science as subscribed to by Dr Michael Behe, whose definition also includes intelligent design and astrology. No, I'm not making that up.

Eberthator 2: Judgement Day


In typically grand bigger and better American fashion, I made this parody of the Terminator 2: Judgment Day film poster. Strangely enough, when it comes to writing the English language, Americans prefer smaller and not better. That's why I called it 'Judgment Day' and not judgement day. Hey, no child left behind requires some degree of compromise.

Roger Ebert as the Terminator in Terminator 2 Judgement Day film poster

Your reviews of Roger Ebert


"Being gay is not a bad thing, unless you're Roger Ebert (the homeliest closet homosexual evar). Two thumbs up where the sun don't shine for him." Krapsody
heavy metal album review rating skulls

"Writing about movies is like dancing about plumbing." Jack Payne
heavy metal album review rating skulls

"I quite like him, actually. But if I wanna see a movie, I don't let a critic convince me otherwise." Drowseymonkey


"I used to agree with Gene Siskel a lot more than Roger Ebert. There's one thing about movie reviewers, though: there are no experts. Sure, some might know more about movies, but their tastes in movies aren't any better than anyone else's." Ben Hoffman
heavy metal rating skulls from the Necro Files. Get your fix of horror flicks.

"I would review Roger Ebert as being totally clueless. Yeh if you are about 100 you might agree with him, but aside from that, if he hates it, most likely I am gonna love it." Lil' Blog of Horrors

heavy metal album review rating skulls

"He should take a long deserved vacation somewhere he can't watch films." Wehireu
heavy metal album review rating skulls

"I felt, when it was Siskel and Ebert, Ebert's reviews were a bit more of a practical/everyman viewpoint than Siskel's were, which were typically pretty harsh. Reviewing on the web, however, is a whole new bag of popcorn." Thrift Shop Romantic
Horror movie ratings on the Necro Files

My babes and badasses reviews


14 May 2008

Human Rights Crisis in Zimbabwe: Bloggers Unite for Human Rights

This is my contribution to the Bloggers Unite for Human Rights initiative. I usually post about fictional horror in the form of horror films, but today I am posting about real-life true story horror.

As a libertarian, I feel that the only legitimate role a government has is protecting the individual rights of its public. This includes its democratic rights.

Zapiro does a brilliant caricature of Robert Mugabe. His dress code is not traditional, but thanks to his indiscretion most of the people are without clothes to wear anyway.

Before things get too morbid, enjoy this comic by South African cartoonist Zapiro. Satire like this is not allowed in Zimbabwe, as the state controls all media. To those who are not Africans, this is not traditional dress code, but thanks to Robert Mugabe most of Zimbabwe can't afford clothes either.

The Hallmarks of Democracy


I personally feel the world would be a much better place once everyone learns to worship me. Most people regard democracy as a better alternative, because it is a system of government "for the people by the people". Since most people are idiots, this amounts to a government for idiots, by idiots. Zimbabwe is a case in point.

For the purpose of this discussion, democracy is characterised by:
  • Organised political parties in competition for government power

  • Free and fair elections

  • Civil and political liberty

Zimbabwean president Robert Mugabe claims that Zimbabweans are enjoying a democracy. Judging by the definition above, this claim seems highly unlikely.

Organised political parties in competition for government power


Membership of an opposition party in Zimbabwe, particularly membership or suspected support of the MDC, is effectively a passport to torture.

Even the leader of the MDC, Morgan Tsvangirai, has been beaten by Zanu-PF mobs and had to travel abroad to seek medical attention.

Due to these discretions, Zimbabwe has been described as a one party state. Zimbabwe effectively has no opposition and the ruling Zanu-PF party undermines any competition.

Free and Fair Elections


The international community has questioned the fairness of Zimbabwean elections for quite some time. The mere fact that the government refused to release the election results of March 2008 for nearly a month, is reason enough for concern.

The escalating violence since the 2008 election makes it clear that a free and fair election in Zimbabwe is a myth.

Civil and Political Liberty


The British government has paid restitutions to Zimbabwe for building its economy. Under the leadership of Ian Smith, Zimbabwe became known as the bread basket of Africa. For the first few years of Robert Mugabe's regime, the government continued this success and even achieved one of the highest literacy rates in Africa.

The situation worsened the moment Robert Mugabe started nationalising white-owned farms. This greatly jeopardised civil and political liberty. Many workers were tortured for defending their employers (and by extension their livelihood). Zanu-PF war veterans (many of whom were too young to be in any war in the first place) claim these workers are brainwashed by the white colonialists and that they want to hand leadership of Zimbabwe back to colonial powers.

Since Ian Smith negotiated the independence of Zimbabwe from British rule in the first place, this is just insane.

Such blatant racist persecution resulted in Zimbabwe experiencing an economic meltdown. Zimbabwe is currently experiencing the highest inflation in the world, and nearly the highest inflation of all time. The once bread basket of Africa is now searching for crumbs in the bush.

There is no civil or political liberty in Zimbabwe. One would expect international organisations like NEPAD, SADC or the AU to take action, or at the very least condemning the dictatorship of Robert Mugabe. However, this is not the case. South African president Thabo Mbeki, leader of the SADC, adopted a 'quiet diplomacy', and even went as far as to deny that there is a crisis in Zimbabwe.

He has blocked any kind of international intervention and even criticised international governments when they wanted to discuss Zimbabwe's dire need at the UN. Mbeki sees sanctions as a Western solution to problems, which would be ineffective in Zimbabwe. The irony is that Mbeki supported sanctions against the apartheid regime not so long ago.

This lame duck syndrome has effectively discredited his reputation as head of the largest economy in Africa, both locally and abroad. Despite tarnishing his own image, Zimbabwe is still not getting any better. In fact, indications are that the situation is getting worse.

How the International Community Can Help Zimbabwe


John Prendergast, co-director of the International Crisis Group's Africa Program, proposes the following:
  • Constructive engagement to urge Mugabe and ZANU-PF toward democracy. This would include international monitoring of the Zimbabwean elections and freedom of the press to report on the elections.

  • An active international effort to get ZANU-PF and MDC together for negotiations has so far been unsuccessful. Mugabe refuses to enter into dialogue with just about anyone.

  • Total isolation of Mugabe's government. I think an arms embargo is a good start.

  • Supporting the NEPAD initiative to get African governments to exert pressure on Mugabe and ZANU-PF to stop the political violence against their opponents.

  • Freeze Zimbabwean assets held internationally.

  • Financial and logistical support for anti-Mugabe elements in Zimbabwean society. This could amount to political interference, but it's the lesser of two evils at this point.

Find Out More


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